all to none

So lately there’s been nothing going on on the home front. HATE hasn’t texted, TAKEN is with his gf in another city, OPTION doesn’t give a shit and SETTLE is just a friend now. Life is officially boring and I’m finally okay with that :)

i seriously need to stop doing things AFTER i post

I texted HATE… went a little better I guess. I’m really not sure what I want out of all this, do I really want to get back with him? Or do I just miss being with someone? I know that if I had to choose between HATE and TAKEN, I’d choose TAKEN. But that’s beside the point because I will never have TAKEN. So HATE knows that I don’t know what I want but I also know that I miss talking to him. No response in 20 minutes probably means I won’t be getting one, so til later.

xoxo, a

updatesss

TAKEN and I have a “date” on Thursday night, exactly one week after the other trainwreck, doing heaven only knows what (left the details up to him). Every time we have one of those deep conversations, we end up bffls again right away. Very weird relationship we have, I must say.

Still nothing from HATE. 

OPTION is still M.I.A., although he’s due back in the area tomorrow.

SETTLE, well I don’t know if he’s still an option, he’s a casual flirt, doesn’t direct too much attention my way and we have yet to be alone. We’ll see how that plans out. Honestly, I just want to get laid.

xoxo, a

just checking in

After my last post TAKEN saw a comment about smoking cigarettes, he didn’t preach but he showed some concern I guess you could say. I didn’t tell him that I started because of all the grief he was causing me, probably should have though, would have thrown him for a loop. But anyway, TAKEN does not like to go to bed angry so he tried to ease the tension with music. He knows me too well. (Here’s something you should all know about me, music heals all wounds. If you’re feeling a certain way, it’s guaranteed that a song has been sung about it.) I kept the conversation short, a few syllables per sentence. I don’t think TAKEN realizes what he’s doing to me. He understands the situation, but he doesn’t understand it’s effect on me. 

HATE never texted me again, joy. I’m not giving up on this one. How long should I wait before trying again?

NIGHTNIGHT by DEDDY